Success Evading You?
How are you feeling? Are you doing the things that truly excite you? Or, are you dragging yourself through life hoping to put away a few bucks for your retirement? Are you consumed with thoughts of paying bills? Covering your monthly expenses? Staying afloat for two more weeks? What about the kids birthday? Will you have enough this month for that? Can you afford it?
Unfortunately for the majority of us we have been trained by the media, education, politicians and parents to look out for and add to the list prejudices that define who we are as a society and who you and I are as individuals. You develop a point of view that only you can own, EVER! Its all yours you can’t even give it away. People may agree or disagree with you but they decide.
Which brings me back to that feeling in the pit of your stomach when the month somehow lasted longer than your cash flow! I have been there and done that. As a matter of fact at one time I was told to declare bankruptcy. How ludicrous. Bankruptcy!
My relationship with self unfortunately lead me down a road of financial and personal ruin. At the time, I was working in a senior position at an international insurance brokerage as a financial planner and had eventually reached a point where every morning the alarm went off I would simply hit the snooze for a few more moments of peace and quiet. After several annoying blasts I’d finally drag my a** out of bed to join the ranks of those, who like me, had been living a life of self imposed slavery. UCH!
Don’t get me wrong, I always did more than I was asked and always had been successful in exceeding the mandated QUOTA! The problem was, my personal relationship with how I had always defined success could no longer serve me. Corporate politics, negotiating the best margins for the company and passing higher premiums on to client, spending to the detriment of the shareholders, blah, blah, blah. My personal list of predjudices grew longer by the minute. Now with my financial situation… you know, the rock and a real hard place to exist.
First things first, I did not nor would I ever declare bankruptcy. Before my insurance gig, I was a banker and not just any banker, I was the area collections manager so I knew that although things looked somewhat grim financially, bankruptcy simply did not look to me to be sound financial advice. Imagine, here I am talking with my banker to hopefully map out a financial solution and they would rather have me declare bankruptcy. Apparently that although I had the cash flow and the required job stability I lacked collateral. I left there shaking my head in disbelief at the cold and impersonal approach given to my finances… they (the bank) appeared to be willing to lose five figures rather than work out an alternative payment schedule. Another prejudice added to my personal list I guess.
As I walked out the banks front door my relationship with money had changed. No longer did I have a pit in my stomach about paying every bill on time, they would simply have to wait, period. I would come first from now on. I would no longer put up with the annoying collection calls either, it was time to take control and give the ultimatum. After all I now had the get out of debt card with the banks preferred bankruptcy route and my intimate credit collection knowledge. I now held all the cards.
Once all my creditors were contacted and my easy payment terms were agreed on another feeling of freedom washed over me. Believe me I have had this feeling before, and am sure you have too. If I were to describe it, imagine the feeling that you had when you first moved out of your parents basement into an apartment of your own. Remember? You may have felt a little uneasy about it in the beginning, but in the back of your mind you knew you would make it. After all the freedom you were feeling at that time… the ability to really do what you wanted to do, whenever you wanted to do it! Personally for me, even as a full time student with a part time income my life was full of exciting activities and experiences. My life was full of personal abundance and life!
So with my newly defined relationship with money and my new sense of self, I actually felt alive, abundant and free. With in a few days after discovering the old me again… the insurance company who had employed me decided to merge with another of their divisions. The stress that day was so thick in our office you could almost swim through it in order to get to the water cooler! Just like an oasis in the Sahara draws a thirsty crowd, talk of the sudden and unexpected news of a merger created quite the crowd. Fear, anger, dread, and that sinking feeling… going under for the third time.
Funny how the universe delivers what you are paying attention to. I got my golden handshake and have never looked back. I changed my relationship with SELF and as a result I got my life back. I knowwhat excites me and follow my excitement every waking moment. I have dropped the things and predjudices that really don’t work for me any more. The result? I have earned more money than even I thought possible. I have more abundance, meaningful relationships and a greater sense of self. I simply became the dealer.
I hold all the cards, and so do you!
